Okay, so I’m obviously not the religious type. But there are some zealots out there who are – despite or because of their religion – good apples. I just wish people would be good because it’s the right thing to do, as opposed to their desire to please a terrifying omnipotent being.

Today’s case in point: In-N-Out Burger. Those wacky Christians make a tasty sandwich, I’ll say!

As best as I can tell, the owners aren’t overly militant about their religion. Sometimes they mention it in Christmastime commercials, they put Bible verse references (but not the verses) in hidden places on their cups, and they have a non-profit foundation that helps kids.

Has the ecstasy of a Double-Double mellowed my militant atheism? Would I sing the praises of Pat Robertson if he made a killer chocolate cake? Would I promote Jerry Falwell if he had an orgasmic bar-b-que sauce?

Now, far more useful than the Da Vinci Code, I present a link to In-N-Out’s secret menu.